Lions, tigers, and bears

Why do men always say, “I don’t know what it is about you” in romantic novels right before they tell the woman they love them? To the chubby or bitter or poor or sarcastic or whatever kind of woman no less. I’ve read so many books lately where that’s the line men use. Do they use that as a pickup line to make the woman feel special and/or mysterious? I wouldn’t put it past them. The sad part is, it works! Or in these books I read it does.

Is that all it takes to snag a good woman? Or does it seem that many authors (a lot of them being female) are making women look desperate? When it comes to my girl friends and relationships, we seem to either be a) reluctant due to a disastrous past relationship OR b) eager due to a great past relationship. Why do we use our past relationships when being introduced to new ones? I am asking so many questions and not really giving any of my answers. I’ll begin now. I think…

1. Why do men always say, “I don’t know what it is about you” in romantic novels right before they tell the woman they love them? I do believe this is a pickup line some men use and it does work. Women love feeling like they are a one-of-a-kind find and this line makes them feel super special. It also gives us that sense that no matter how many feelings we show or weird things we admit, we still have some mystery left. I know that’s something I want to feel in a relationship. I don’t want to be just another girlfriend that looks like all of the others and acts like them too. I don’t think anyone does.

2. I just answered that second question with the first…

3. Is that all it takes to snag a good woman? No, that is NOT all it takes to snag a good woman no matter what books say. Women are full of nooks and crannies that need to be filled and/or discovered. The way I see it, women are like mazes and the men are the mice. They run through the maze, on the right track, thinking they have it all figured out then BAM! they hit a dead end and have to start all over. I will say, I have felt this way about men too, but from what I’ve heard my ENTIRE life is that women are the more complicated sex even though I have had a fair share of being very confused by men. So we share a lot of the same traits. Did I just shoot myself in the foot by saying that? Damn..another question I was asking myself. Anyways…

4. Or does it seem that many authors (a lot of them being female) are making women look desperate? Having read quite a few books lately, most of which were the romantic comedy type, authors do sometimes make women seem a bit desperate and easy. Anyone who knows the definition of a woman knows there is no “easy” anywhere in it. Sometimes we do get soft when we see a sexy shirtless guy with his muscles bulging, but I would bet that at least 50% of women would not just lay down and let him ravish her. Or maybe I’m wrong, but I hope I’m right for the sake of women. I’m not saying this would be an easy task if the sexy man mentioned above walked up to me and gave me one of those Hollywood kisses, but it is possible. Unless it was Ian Somerhalder or Hugh Jackman.

That’s a whole different story, but I will admit that I would not give them my “goodies” on the first date. Women, especially the bitter and bruised, do not swoon very easily no matter how attractive the guy is so all of those books out there being read by tween and teenage girls are just setting them up for a fairy tale ending that most likely doesn’t exist. Unless you’re Kate Middleton. So that’s totally not fair when they get out in the “real” world and discover most (NOT ALL) men are animals. Animals that are carnivores, but don’t have cute and cuddly tendencies like lions, tigers, and bears, OH MY!

5. Why do we use our past relationships when being introduced to new ones? I believe the answer to this question is simple. We don’t want to get hurt again. It’s a risky business out there in the dating world no matter how beautiful you are. I do think that we can sometimes set ourselves up for failure in a relationship by comparing the guy to our past boyfriends. That’s not fair at all, is it? Nope, but we still do it because we become bitter and guarded after that one man grabs our heart and squeezes it into a million lonely pieces. We can’t be completely guilty for that because it’s a defense mechanism. The human body has lots of those. In order for us to let someone new into our life and possibly hearts, we have to give them a chance. It could be Prince Charming knocking at the door and we will never know unless we answer it. They make think the same about us. That we are man-eating monsters much like the lions, tigers, and bears, OH MY!  Some women are, but a lot don’t mean to be. No matter how tough we look or act we have a soft spot inside, you men just have to work a little harder to find it.

I think I’ve answered all of the questions I asked myself. Yay me.

I’ve began to think we have completely let all romance fly out the windows. To prove this, I had to look up romance because I forgot what it meant exactly.

Ro-mance- (noun) “A feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love.”

Well that explains why the line men use about us being mysterious works…I’m no love or relationship guru, but I have had experience with it. Some good. Some bad. I am here to tell you that no matter how badly you’ve been heartbroken you will heal eventually and become the best person you can be. And wiser! So keep your chin up and answer the door when a possible Prince Charming comes knocking.

Until then…stare at Ian and Hugh. 😉

-Candice-

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