Jealousy: A Drive to Destruction?

At some point or another in our lives we have felt jealous for one reason or another. Jealousy can be a tough feeling to get over. It builds up inside you and burns you to the ground.

The definition of jealous is actually “Feeling or showing envy of someone or their achievements and advantages.” That sums it up perfectly. Jealousy is actually pathetic if you think about it. We are feeling so down on ourselves that we choose to look at someone else and forget all of our great qualities and play the pity party. Why do we do that? It’s sad. Instead, we should think  “good for you, but here’s how I’m awesome too…”.

How do you get over it?

Here are a few steps on how:

Step 1: Focus on what you’re jealous about. Denying it is a killer and as they say admitting it is the first step.

Step 2: Who does your jealousy involve? After you’ve figured that out, decide why you’re jealous of him/her or them.

Step 3: Forgive that person or people for what they’ve done even if it hurts and seems impossible. Jealousy can turn into hatred very quickly. Hatred hurts you more than it does anyone else because it’s hard to do. Try and talk to him/her or them and make things right. If they don’t accept your truce then they are asses who need to grow up.

Step 4: Let it go. You’ll feel a huge relief inside. I promise.

I actually apologized to a few people a couple weeks back after a close friend of mine inspired me by apologizing to me for some drama we had months ago.

Because of that small action, it lead me to let go of some unwanted and bitter feelings. I held on to the hatred I had for certain people for so long and let it take over a part of me inside. Well, one day I got on Facebook (since I no longer had their contact information) and sent 2 old friends a message. This is something you can try too. I told them I was sorry for acting rude in the past and for holding bitter thoughts against them. They had both done things to me (unforgivable to some people) that had really hurt. The boy had broken my heart and didn’t think leading me on was anything he shouldn’t do. Typical guy, right? No offense. The girl had stabbed me in the back and went after my ex boyfriend whom she knew I still had feelings for. That’s one of the first rules in girl world. Ex boyfriends are OFF LIMITS no matter what. I chose to let all of those incidences go. Turns out both of the people ignored my messages which I figured would happen (sometimes you have to think pessimistic in order to guard yourself, but only sometimes). The good thing that came out of this was I let things go and felt a HUGE relief afterward. That’s really all that matters.

There’s so many things on this earth that have the power to turn envy into jealousy, but we just have to be strong and overcome them. There’s a quote that I ran across on Pinterest. “Jealousy is just hate and love at the same time.” I won’t tell you who said it for a few embarrassing reasons, but it really does make sense. In certain situations anyways. If you’re thinking about someone so much that they take over your thoughts then you obviously have some feelings for them. If you really didn’t like them then you would not be thinking about them. Take a Victoria’s Secret fashion model for example. Every girl wants to be one and every guy wants to get with one, but I bet you that even they wake up on some days and dislike what they see in the mirror. Makeup and airbrushing do many things. As for men go, I chose Daniel Craig aka James Bond 007. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a guy say they didn’t want to be him. Sexy women falling at your feet while you kill bad guys with the sharpest moves and most badass weapons which eventually equals out to saving the world from turmoil? I can’t see why guys would want that. Ha ha.

There’s a guy you like, but can’t “have” because the Barbie in his history class got him with her stunning good looks? Too bad. You deserve better. The girl you’ve been checking out for years is dating one of the obnoxious guys on your college football team? Feel better about yourself because you most likely have more brain cells and his shining moment in life might only be his time spent on the football field. Eh that’s a bit harsh, but sometimes the truth.

One that refers to me would be being jealous of how other girls look. The truth is, we will never be happy with our appearance or what we’ve got. We should realize how much we do in fact have everyday because there are so many less fortunate people on this planet. Starving children and homeless people probably wake up every day and thank the heavens for what they have more then we do. I know it’s true for me.

From now on, I will go to bed thankful and wake up thankful. Hey it’s a small price to pay don’t you think? If we can’t let things go and move one, they will consume us. Don’t let that happen because everyone has potential.

Good night, folks.

-Candice-

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